Stelle Grande

Jay had the Bieber fever bad last night, but I think he's glad now that I drug him to the Big Star documentary instead of the teen scream-fest.  It was a terrific film, well done.  One cool aspect of the show is that there is no script, no narration or voice-overs; the story is told from start to finish in the reminiscences of those interviewed. And it's a very involving story, told by those who know it well.  I hope it finds its way to a city near you.    

Playin the Ponies

You degenerate gamblers are hereby exhorted to wager upon the only horse known to be named for a bastard - Handsome Mike - at tomorrow's Breeder's Cup Classic. I'm pretty sure he's on the dope.

I Want It

I don't wear watches too much anymore, but this one might get me back in the habit. $29.99 at Amazon. Cheap!

TONIGHT!

The finished cut of Big Star: Nothing Can Hurt Me sees its Memphis premiere this evening at the 15th annual Indie Memphis Film Festival. Lurker, the missus and I will be in attendance, and I'm just the least little bit excited about it. So far, all reviews have been positive.

Full report to follow!

You Know You're Scared!

Happy Halloween, bastards! Disney acquires Lucasfilm and you're looking at Star Wars: Episode VII in 2015. Please advise.

Anybody Wanna Talk About It?

Because it's getting REALLY good.

Waxwings

You're all encouraged to love the album Low to the Ground by the Waxwings. You like your melodic jangle, right? Finally The Poobah Forwards The Pop.

One, Two... FIVE! ("Three, sir, THREE!")

Don't know if any other Tolkien nerds populate the greater bastardate. I'm decidedly lukewarm about splitting this appetizer of a Tolkien tale into THREE SEPARATE FILMS, even if it does incorporate material from the appendices of Lord of the Rings. I doubt it'll be Jackson's own Episode I / Jar-Jar stumble, but still...

Mostly I care because I wish he'd abandon this and film like FIVE movies out of The Silmarillion, which is ass-kicking, majestic, epic. Would love to see Fëanor, Fingolfin, Morgoth, Lúthien, etc in the hands of an inspired director.

Catchy Friday

We still do pop, right? Enjoy.

November 9!

This looks goooooood. For comparison, I'd rate Casino Royale a solid A and Quantum of Solace a B-.

Oh ... Alright, Maybe Just This Once

Ahem

I can't stop looking at this picture...

Bend Beyond

Has anyone else gotten to that Woods yet? It's some Fucking Transcendent Pop.  I can see how I never heard of them.  I'ts only their seventh record.

One Nation Under Bob

Still trying to find the presidential ticket that allows me to vote for a hero who is better than I deserve.

In the meantime please enjoy my friend Davis recently hoisting Bob GBV Pollard into the sky.

Have you hugged your indie rock god today?

New Stones!

Doom and Gloom. Evidently we are in for another hits retrospective with a couple of new singles thrown in to make the completists bite. I want a tour.

What They Really Said.

Here's what was actually said during the debate last week.

In Case You Missed Them...

Radiohead will be performing on Austin City Limits this week. Check local listings for details, OR, you can just watch the program here on WLBU...


You better jump on this opportunity before Mitt Romney cuts PBS's funding and gets rid of Radiohead and Big Bird.

P.S. bon Iver is next week. 

The election Will Be Won On The Beer Aisle

Apparently all this hubub over who will be the next president is just a waste of time. Well, we already knew that, but now we know how to figure out who will win based on beer. If they would have listened to me, I coulda told them this a long time ago...

I prefer Amstel, Stella, and Yazoo microbrew from here in Nashville. I guess that means 4 more years, but with fewer taxes, and gay marriage rights with every gun purchase. Stay thirsty my Bastards...

The Original Frankenweenie

Here's the 1984 short film that must not have been all that Burton wanted it to be.  

You Bastards Should Appreciate This... And It's All For Charity

Hey, it's not much but it's something. Paul Westerberg and Tommy Stinson are gettin' the band back together. Sort of. 

Basically they're getting together to make a record of covers and sell it for charity to help former Replacements guitarist Slim Dunlap. He had a stroke earlier this year and is partially paralyzed.

Anyway, they are only releasing 250 of the 10 inch LP's and they will all be auctioned off online.

So there's that.  1/2 the Replacements is better the no The Replacements. Now you know what to get Jay for Christmas...

Fonejacker

This had me in tears, but you're mileage may vary.

Mike, We Have a Date This Weekend

Right?

As Long As We're Watching Stones Films

Joe, please hit the festival circuit and let us know about this one.

Best (unofficial) Political Ad Yet

Someone spent some serious time on this.  Can't stop marveling and laughing. 

You Know You're Gonna...

...check out some awesome local talent tonight. Cause that's what we do on Fridays, right?

Pinellas Park, Florida

Is where I saw Devo. And I can't think of a more appropriate place to see them. I have to agree with Jay that Devo can still bring it. I highly recommend chasing them down. Blondie opened. Seemed good at the time, but I didn't think about them much after Devo. Sorry, Dave. Oh! I also got to see Matthew Sweet do Girlfriend in Madison. He sounded great. Hope he gets out and does the new album now.

Shit

I see your Shoes and raise you a Kaiser Chiefs..

I am totally loving the '05 Kaiser Chiefs album Employment at the moment.  I wonder if any of you have a Friend To Play it for you? 

Yes! Yes! Yes!

UPDATE! As Eric noted, the video's been yanked from YouTube. But you can still see it here.

For now.

Dang

Shoes are back with their first album of new material in 18 years. I'm about four songs in, but I think they've made my 2012 top ten list. This album came out in July, and I'm wondering why none of you bastards caught it.

Frankly, That's Pretty sad.

Go Where You Want To Go!

Suddenly, 1989 seems like the 19th century.

Kwon Soon Keun

Already seen this? 

Take any drummer and extend him/her to its natural limits and you have something like Kwon Soon Keun.  He's the subject of a documentary and a YouTube sensation, as evidenced here.   



He's like an Asian Keith Moon but with a joyous effervescence that outpaces Richard Simmons.  I started out rolling my eyes, but can't seem to stop myself searching for more of his clips.  Fun stuff.   

Mann, It's Tough Out There

More Mann: I know all y'alls watch Portlandia in accordance with the mandate from Poobah Q. Potentate -- how lamentable that even alterna-rock indie goddesses have to moonlight.

YARRRRRRRRR!

We all speak like pirates anyway, and one of us spends a great deal of time in the ocean --- no one needs to tell us it's Talk Like a Pirate Day. Grog! Wenches! Yarrr!

Okay, This Is Cool

YouTube Doubler

Aimee Mann's new video Labrador, side by side with the old Til Tuesday video. Anybody going to put their free five bucks towards this one? I know it looks like shit, Jay. Better here.

Jib Jab Worthy

Any of you bastards taking the bait this time around?

Blow It Out Your Ass ... With Scott Toilet Tissue

That's a new slogan I've been kicking around For Their Products. Released in June, this is Lex Hives, The Hives return to big, stupid fun after the inevitable mature album.

Wipe With This

Free Toilet Paper! 

New Dylan

Free Toilet Paper, or free new Dylan record, Tempest?  Thanks, Scott (and Jay), I'll take the Bob!

What did ya'll get?

Side By Side

See you all there.

How I Spent My Labor Day Weekend

Well, part of it.

Wild Eagle is a steel Wing Coaster at Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. It is the first of its kind in the United States. The ride was opened to park employees and their families on March 20, 2012, opened for season passholders on March 23, 2012, and officially opened to the public on March 24, 2012.

Type	Steel - Wing Coaster
Manufacturer	Bolliger & Mabillard
Model	Wing Coaster
Lift/launch system	Chain lift hill
Height	210 ft (64 m)
Drop	135 ft (41 m)
Length	3,127 ft (953 m)
Speed	61 mph (98 km/h)
Inversions	4
Duration	2:22
Height restriction	4 ft 2 in (127 cm)
Trains	2 trains with 7 cars. Riders are arranged 4 across in a single row for a total of 28 riders per train.

Talking Funny

Don't know if y'all have more or less leisure time on three-day weekends. But this is worth it.

Four

New one from Bloc Party.  It's Called Four.  Thanks, Praise.  I'll take both.

Big Labor Day Plans?

Let's be sensible out there.

I don't care about Marvel vs DC I just want some good nut shots

Deja Vu all over again

Too soon. Too soon.

Full Metal Jacket Diary App?

Yes, please.

APP OVERVIEW
Arriving just in time for the film's 25th anniversary, this immersive Kickstarter-funded iPad app offers fans the choice to read or listen to Matthew Modine's personal diary kept during the filming of Kubrick's Vietnam War masterpiece, FULL METAL JACKET. It features hundreds of high quality, never-before-seen photographs plus sound effects, original music, and much, much more!

FULL FEATURES
- Modine's complete diary text from his out-of-print, award-winning, metal-bound book, FULL METAL JACKET DIARY
- 5 chapters chronicling the filmmaking process – Private Life, Vietnam, Boot Camp, On Leave, and Boot Camp Redux
- A nearly 4 hour audiobook with Modine's absorbing narration, produced with immersive sound effects and original music
- Over 400 high-res photos and personal documents scanned from original negatives and source material
- Detailed information on photos including dates, locations, and all-new remembrances written by Modine
- Three bonus galleries featuring select photo restoration comparisons
- Interactive "favorites" gallery designed to simulate Matthew's original contact sheets used in compiling his book
- Store your favorite photos and audio clips for later
- Select your favorite photos and tweet your friends!
- "What Was Stanley Like?" – A one-minute fully animated video featuring Modine's narration and photographs
- Handwritten on-screen "help" – get help from Matthew at any time while reading or listening to his diary
- Links to related articles, videos, content, and much more!
- Compatible with iPad 1 and 2, and optimized for the new iPad with HD Retina display

Great Moments in Acting Concentration

Yum.  And hey, speaking of ROTLA,  check this out! 

Bastards Assemble!

...& worship at the altar of IMAX.

Attendance is not mandatory but is strongly encouraged.

It's Funny Because It's (Allegedly) True

Tampa Bay Gay Prostitutes Gearing Up For Flood Of Closeted Republicans

It's Always Sunny in Seattle

I'm taking in a conference in Seattle (Government Purchasing, NOT Hempfest.  I swear!).  This is a damn nice town, and the weather has been great the whole time I've been here.  And the food!  I may never leave.

Tom Waits = The Joker

We all love Tom Waits (at least we fucking better). We also all love Heath Ledger's take on the Joker (at least we fucking better). Are the two related? Watch this painfully awkward TW interview from 1979 and you tell me (at least you fucking better).

Electric Bird Digest

This Fantastic Tune Parade is an early 90s gem from the beloved Fellows. Definitely worth a spin if you haven't heard it or haven't listened for awhile. Produced by Butch Vig and featuring great tunes from Scott, Kurt, and company, it is probably my favorite Fellows album. Hillbilly Drummer Girl, Looking Around, Thirsty, and Hard to Mention are particular faves. Enjoy Bastards!

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Real Actors Reading YELP Reviews

Professional actor Chris Kipiniak (Law and Order, The Good Wife) puts the full weight of his dynamic gifts behind this interpretation of an online restaurant review.

Award winning actor Brian O'Neill (Damages, The Sopranos) uses his talents to reveal the deep pathos in this review of a concert venue in Santa Ana, California posted to Yelp by Garrett M.

I could watch these all day.

Sheet

From McSweeney's website:

Beck’s latest album comes in an almost-forgotten form—twenty songs existing only as individual pieces of sheet music, never before released or recorded. Complete with full-color, heyday-of-home-play-inspired art for each song and a lavishly produced hardcover carrying case (and, when necessary, ukelele notation), Song Reader is an experiment in what an album can be at the end of 2012—an alternative that enlists the listener in the tone of every track, and that’s as visually absorbing as a dozen gatefold LPs put together. The songs here are as unfailingly exciting as you’d expect from their author, but if you want to hear “Do We? We Do,” or “Don’t Act Like Your Heart Isn’t Hard,” bringing them to life depends on you.

Dave/Jay will you favor us with any DIY Beck tunes?

Shit

Joe Kubert. Google him.

Uh ...

Psychedelic Fur

More reports from this guy please.

Get Your Beast On

Beasts of the Southern Wild is a really fine film.  The "southern wild" is lower Louisiana, outside the levees, in a ragged community of homemade shacks and independent spirits.  It's in limited release, but catch it if you can.  

You Better Stay Away From Downtown

After a 15 year break, Redd Kross is back. With some Fucking Terrific Power pop.

I'm Gonna Wreck It!

This looks indescribably good.

Ouch

Scottish comedian Frankie Boyle for the win.

Olympic All-Name Team

           Dong Dong

               China,
            trampoline

           Kim Yoo-Suk

           South Korea,
             pole vault

                                                                  Hulk

                                                                 Brazil,
                                                  soccer excuse me football

If you stop watching beach volleyball for a second, you'll notice some outstandingly named athletes. Dong Dong won the gold!

What do Joe, Barack Obama, and my mother have in common?

It's their birthdays! Have a great one Bastard Joe!

NTSF: SD: SUV

Not sure how this one got by me. I should spend more time watching television.

Get Your Filthy Poem Away From Me

Leonard Cohen's Book of Longing figures into a recent Silicon Valley venture capital sexual harassment lawsuit. The book - a gift from a senior partner to a woman in the firm - was described as "equivalent to making a crude proposal or touching in an inappropriate place". Bloggery here. Full story here.

I'm starting to see the required summer reading on this blargh in a whole new light.

The Land of Happy Little Accidents

I'm sure we've all done this at one time or another... watch The Joy of Painting that is

On YouTube, No One Cares If You Scream

I found this really, really well done Alien documentary the other day and thought I'd pass it along. Ridley Scott, Dan O'Bannon (R.I.P.), Ronald Shusett, H.R. Giger, Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, Veronica Cartwright, Harry Dean Stanton and a few others weigh in with their memories of this horror classic.

All seven parts can be found here.

Congratulations, Bastard!

Camera-wielding shark whisperer and upstanding bastard Matt has sold five photographs! Due to copyright issues, we won't post them here... but I have it on good authority that they're largely tasteful semi-nude shots of Jay, much as above.

Shit

Muppet Pride

The muppets have dumped Chick-Fil-A as a business partner. It came out that Chick-Fil-A recently donated $2 million to groups considered anti-gay. Their president mentioned something about "biblical principles", but of course no one pressed him on the more vile passages of Deuteronomy. More here.

As you can see from the above Electric Six/Muppet performance, they've always been loud and proud.

Free Willard!

Film star and Bastard hero Fred Willard (Spinal Tap, Anchorman,etc.) was arrested for lewd conduct at an adult-themed theater in L.A. last week. His only previous lewd conduct charge was in 1990, so he may get off with um, counseling. Story here.

Willard's review: a "lousy film".

I know, I know.. there are still adult theaters?

Bastards Assemble(d)!

Bastards Eric, Matt and Jay called an emergency assembly in Nashville this past Saturday. And as three bastards is all we need for a quorum (Bastard Charter, Article 1, Section 8, Clause 1), several pressing orders of business were addressed. Perhaps the most surprising was Grand Poobah's closing pronouncement, which I quote word-for-word below:

Joe is no longer Consigliari. He's going to be our lawyer in Vegas. That's no reflection on Joe it's just the way I want it.

Not So Fast, Matt

Happy belated birthday, you bastard! See you tomorrow, by the way.

Brilliant One-Two Punch

Things are getting interesting. From CNN ("Mitt Romney's painfully bad week"):

Thursday morning, the Obama campaign released a tough ad attacking the record of downsizing and outsourcing at Romney's old firm, Bain Capital. 

The Romney campaign reacted with outrage. That same day, it announced a multimillion-dollar purchase of airtime for an ad that bluntly accused President Obama of lying. 

In support of the ad, Romney's team argued that he had left Bain Capital in February 1999; the incidents alluded to by the Obama campaign all occurred after that date and had nothing to do with Romney. 

Wham. The first attack on Romney had been a jab, dropping Romney's guard against the haymaker: On Friday, the Obama team counter-charged that it was Romney who was lying in his ads or who had committed a felony, lying on 140 official forms that he signed as CEO and sole shareholder of Bain between 1999 and 2002. 

Romney now chased the Obama story, granting five TV interviews to reiterate his version of events. The more he talked, the more deeply into trouble he sank. By Sunday, even Romney supporters were urging the thing he wants least: release of more income tax returns. 

And here again, what got Romney into the trouble was his war room. It was the too-fierce response to Attack 1 -- the adamant insistence that Romney had nothing, nothing to do with anything that happened at Bain after February 1999 -- that set up Romney for Attack 2: Did he lie on SEC forms? And now he will struggle through the rest of the election trying to reconcile his answers.

2012 Marvel Handbook Casually Reveals Peter Parker Uncircumcised

God bless The Onion.

This Is Genius

I have a complaint.

You bastards need to check out The Monkeys You Ordered, a sublime collection of literal New Yorker cartoon captions.

Spoilers!

I liked Prometheus and still think this is funny.

And before I forget...

You know who is great? Bruno Mars. Fantastic songwriting and a very engaging vocalist. I know most of you idiots don't really dig modern pop music, but stop yer hating and Feel This Prophecy: you will dig this album.

Back in the New York Groove Pt. 2

So please excuse my absence lo these many weeks. Work and family have taken me away from my Commodore 64. New York for the History Link '12 conference was great. I drank a lot of beer and learned a lot of shit about immigrants, labor movements, and how Wall Street sank us in all this debt (BONUS: when you make debt into a commodity and sell it, things suck!). The fact that all of our seminars featured liberal professors from Yale has NO BEARING on the things we learned, I swear. Highlight: a reunion with drummer Sean, who I hadn't seen in almost 20 years. Jay didn't show because of 'creative differences' and 'lifestyle differences'. Bastard.

Insert California Song Title Here

Heading to the West Coast, boys.  For one fucking day.  At least it's a big fucking deal.

How Many Frames In A Pint?

I didn't see any of yous bastards at CinemaCon or Comic-Con 2012, but I assume that's just because you were in costume.
The buzz at CinemaCon was that The Hobbit will be in 48 frames per second instead of the traditional 24 fps... and will be a horrible cross between soap opera and high-def sports television. PC mag has a wonderful Frame Rates Explained piece that enlightened me.

I don't recall the above scene from the book, but it's been a long time, and hey, artistic license.

Nike's Brilliant Marketing Strategy

I'm in.

In Case You're Confused

God Bless Bill Moyers

Shit

Dubstep Dispute

Glorious Outsider Art

From Light in the Attic Records:

Pacific Northwest isolation mixed with wide-eyed ambition, a strong sense of family and the gift of music proved to be quite the combination for teenage brothers Donnie and Joe Emerson. Originally released in 1979, Dreamin’ Wild is the sonic vision of the talented Emerson boys, recorded in a family built home studio in rural Washington State. Situated in the unlikely blink-and-you-missed-it town of Fruitland and far removed from the late 1970s punk movement and the larger disco boom, Donnie and Joe tilled their own musical soil, channeling bedroom pop jams, raw funk, and yacht rock.

Why? Because when you live in the sticks, it's Fun To Pretend.

I Laughed Way Too Hard At This

LOVE LOVE LOVE This Show

And miss it a lot. Wasn't there a special in the works?

Shit

Dave's sheriff, Andy Griffith has gone to be with Aunt Bee and Floyd the Barber.  If you get a chance, watch Kazan's A Face In The Crowd, where he is a decidedly less wholesome character.  Part of the story takes place in Memphis.  Need I say more?