Higgs Boson Remix

Happy 2013 Bastards! I'm trying to re-fortify the nerd parts of my brain. Figured I'd start with the beginning of everything.

Happy Green Day

If you're celebrating today, have a nice time and be careful of green beer.

Anybody Else ...

Bad As Me?

Failure To Participate in this survey is grounds for disbastarding.

Salesmanship

Coffee Table of the Gods - $8 (Minneapolis)

Date: 2011-07-21, 1:18AM CDT
Reply to: sale-ppre5-2505248081@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

This coffee table is perfect for someone with a cocaine habit or shooting a porno movie.
As you can see from the photo, the majestic beauty of this coffee table rivals earthly treasures such as: the color of the sky at sunset, the laughter of a small child, and infidelity.

Qualities of the table:
-Carpeted
-Mirrored
-The muthertrucker spins
-Doesn't have any weird splotches under black lights

Due to the assumed large demand for this table, all inquirers will be subjected to a quiz to determine their level of badass-ity.

The price of the table is firm: $7.83, four cans of Chef Boyardee Beef Ravioli, and a framed photo of Betty White.

Location: Minneapolis
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 2505248081

Now that we're all considering selling off our shit, I figured we could draw some inspiration from this outstanding craigslist post.

TGI Mardi Gras

Embrace your inner Charlie Sheen, bastards!

"London Calling" Comes to Rock Band 3

Is this one of the signs of the Apocalypse? The Clash. On a video game?! Does the Wii come with a bass guitar controller? Jay will need it...

AVAST!

I embrace the deep roots of bastardy with a hearty celebration of Talk Like A Pirate Day. Please enjoy an excellent talk like a pirate tutorial, the article that helped vault this holiday into world consciousness, and Los Bastardos Unidos translated into Pirate.

What's That Noise?

Summer Reading

Thanks for the invite guys. I just thought I'd start off by providing a few tomes to read at you leisure this summer. Based on previous content, I selected a few titles that may be right up your alley....

enjoy...