The rumors are true...

We're getting hitched! Don't know when or where, but Bastard attendance is mandatory, regardless of distance or cost. I'll be registered at Hussey's General Store. 

Hey, We're 3!

Happy birthday, LBU!

On Turning 40

Shit

I'm heading up to Washington state tomorrow as my dad is having open heart valve replacement surgery on Wednesday. As far as these things go, its fairly routine, but they still have to crack him open, etc. Please send positive thoughts and/or messages to the deity of your choice our way.

Truckin' for Jesus

Did you heathens know that in the holy book of Isiah, somewhere in Chapter 35, there is a reference to a "highway of holiness?" Did you also know that there's an Interstate 35 in the United States, traveling from the holy city of New Laredo, through Austin (Willie), Dallas (near where JFK was shot), Oklahoma City (need I remind you), and Minneapolis (falling bridge)? Start prayin', boys. And if you can watch this freak for more than 8 seconds, you're a better Christian than I.

Happy Turkey Day

Everybody have a safe Thanksgiving, and make sure to eat until you're uncomfortable.

Firefox 3 Beta!

CNET is reporting that Firefox 3 beta has been released. I'm a huge Firefox fan, so this is exciting news. Generally, other, more popular browsers steal all their best ideas from the Little Mozilla Browser That Could, but I'll stand on the highest mountain in the land and proclaim that IE7 sucks whale dicks. It's slow, insecure, and its mother smells like potted meat. (Hey, kinda like Joe!)

Besides Gecko 1.9, there are a number of areas of change for Firefox 3. Among them:

• Security. New features include the ability to integrate antivirus software with downloads; one-click Web site identity verification; automatic testing to make sure plug-ins aren't older versions found to be insecure and automatic disabling if they are; and support for Windows Vista parental controls.

• Ease of use. Touted improvements include downloading that can be resumed after the browser has been restarted or network connection reset; users can zoom and out of Web pages in their entirety, including layout, text, and graphics; plug-ins can be managed centrally with the Add-On Manager; and mailto links can now launch Web-based e-mail applications such as Gmail, not just local applications on the PC such as Outlook.

• Personalization. Web pages can be bookmarked with one click and tagged with a double-click (though the interface looked rough to me); the aforementioned feature provides a list of possible matching Web pages based on what you type in the location bar; and a new Smart Places folder provides access to pages that are frequently visited or that have been recently bookmarked and tagged.

Read the article here.

205 Sand Dollar Ln

Finally, we closed. Naturally, the movers can't be here until tomorrow, and the new beds we ordered (because our old ones got ruined in storage) won't be here for a couple of days. This has truly been the move from hell and somehow refuses to die. We do like the house, though. It's too small by about 500 sq ft, but it's really close to the water (but not too close), and even though it needs a lot of updating, it's a solid house on a nice lot.

Pics of the outside here.

The Closer?

Anybody know if Joe is still closing today?

(Hey, how 'bout that Kyra Sedgwick?)

Lovely

We had an inspection on the little house we wanted to buy. Turns out that termites have not suffered the slump in the real estate market that everyone else has, especially where this house is concerned. The inspector deemed it "major structural damage" and showed us a couple of spots where you could step on the floor and potentially open up a new access point to the crawlspace. We're dropping what we're willing to pay to ridiculously low levels - so low the owners probably (and maybe hopefully) won't take it. So we're back to square one. Or maybe two, since we've got a couple of other potential places identified.

The best part is that when we went out to look at the place again after the inspection, I was walking around the house and noticed a bunch of wasps on a window. Hmm, there are a lot of wasps on that window, I thought, just as one stung me RIGHT ON THE FUCKING FOREHEAD. So that evening and the whole next day, I was uncomfortable and had a little bit of a headache, but no big deal. Until around 8pm when I looked in the mirror and noticed that my forehead was swelling around the sting spot. By around 8:45 it was starting to spread around my eyes. I iced it down and that seemed to help a little. I woke up yesterday morning and my whole face was puffy. I felt really crappy, so I did the walk-in to the Doctors office. Three hours and a steroid shot later, I walked out with a prescription for allergy medicine and slightly less discomfort.

All seems okay now. Not that you care.

Ankiel Smash

The Rick Ankiel story is an amazing one. He shot to the big leagues as a 20-year-old phenom pitcher, but developed a bizarre psychological problem and lost the ability to throw the ball over the plate. After a long struggle, he gave up pitching, reinvented himself as an outfielder, starting his career over from scratch. Two and a half years later, he returned to the big leagues last night to a standing ovation and hit a home run in his first game back.

He spent most of the season here in Memphis with the Redbirds, the Cardinals' AAA affiliate, and led the league in HRs. Incidentally, the promotion for tonight's Redbirds game is a Marvel comic book featuring the Hulk, Iron Man, Spiderman and Rick Ankiel.

Suddenly ... Minivan!

Soozan picked up a 2007 Toyota Sienna this past Saturday. We're finally rid of our complete piece of shit Grand Cherokee, trading up for one of the most reliable vehicles on the road. It's the Cadillac of minivans!

(Now, if I can just find a Cramps sticker ...)

Successful Deathmatch Test

Lurker and I successfully tested the listen server last week, and we're ready to kick it up a notch. Joe, are you still MIA until September, or could you squeeze in an hour or two one night this week?

Also, because the server shows up on a gigantic list of servers on the Steam Engine, we need a name. Anybody got a good one?

Alaskan Adventures

OK, I'm not as cool as Steve McQueen (who got a DUI in Alaska and subsequently took the mug shot you see here), but I did get pretty wasted in our 49th state.

After 24 hours of travel across four time zones, we finally arrived in Homer at midnight (felt like 4 am to us) and proceeded to go to a bar called Charakters. After several pints of a local brew and listening to Jewel's brother's band (!), Mike and I decided it would be a good idea to play guitar and drink whiskey and champagne for another hour or so. Did I mention it never gets dark? My body was in complete disarray. The next day, I puked here, here, and here. Good times. I will say that Homer is very beautiful- everywhere in town you are surrounded by gorgeous mountains and fresh, cold water.

Recover was slow but I rallied on the third day in time to start prepping for the wedding. Frog's boss donated 30 lbs. each of scallops, shrimp, halibut, salmon, and crab legs. Caroline and I helped our friend from New Orleans, Chef Rob, turn all of it into the best wedding food of all time. It involved lots of shopping, running around, and driving cars with no brakes down precipitous, winding hills. Everyone in Alaska seems to own three or four cars, none of which run very well, and all of which have the keys left in them at all times for anyone to use.

The wedding itself was a huge success. It rained quite a lot that afternoon, but after some logistical shuffling, Frog came down the aisle to Mike and I playing and singing the V.U.'s "I'm Sticking With You". Sadly, the ceremony was not filmed, although there are plenty of pics (which I'll post when we get 'em back). The ceremony was brief and I am now a 'Wedding Commissioner' in the state of Alaska. Bride and groom danced to AC/DC and a swell time was had by all.

We flew from Homer to Anchorage in an 8 seat plane that cruised at about 2500 feet. Talk abour unvarnished beauty. All around there were no signs of human life at all: no roads, power lines, boats, nada. Just glaciers, lakes, mountains, and greenery. Absolutely stunning. As for Alaska itself, I can completely understand its appeal for certain people or for anyone wanting to get away from something or wanting to start fresh. Still, the 50 degree highs in mid-June convinced me it was not a place for me to be long term. Also, Alaskanas, while friendly, definitely are part of an exclusive 'club' and seem to carry that designation like a badge of honor. Pride of place and all that, but eccentricity can turn into boorishness at a pretty quick clip.

This Takes Me Back ...

First Day Of Shooting For Indy 4

Can you believe the first Indiana Jones movie came out 26 years ago?! I was 12.

You have got to check out this website, the "only online source for official Indiana Jones news, updates, and much more."

Indy used to be tough and ruthless; now, he's looking rough and toothless. I'm actually looking forward to this, though.

North to Alaska

On Wednesday, our Summer Tour of Weddings begins with our sojourn to Homer, Alaska (located along the Kenai Peninsula, above, and also hometown of Jay's favorite poetess, Jewell). There I will be the officiant at the wedding of Mike Werts, longtime collaborator and would-be Bastard. Following, we will go to Spokane to be met by Caroline's parents and sister for a Meeting of the Tribes. We'll return to Durham on July 2. I will probably only be able to post sporadically during this time (do they even have the "Internet" in Alaska?). In the very likely event that I am mauled by a bear, overrun by a slowly creeping glacier, trampled by a moose, or kidnapped onto a Russian whaling/vodka boat, it has been a pleasure serving with you.

Today I am Forty

Another milestone reached, and a time for reflection:

At 40, my dad had raised three children, the youngest aged 12
I have no kids.
At 40, my dad had owned 3 homes.
I pay rent.
At 40, my dad owned and operated his own business.
I am a journeyman teacher.
At 40, my dad was well-known in the community.
I am rootless at the moment.
At 40, my dad had prepared for his (and our) future by saving and investing.
For the most part, I am still living paycheck to paycheck.

By the standard measures of 'success'and 'accomplishment', it is tough to compare. However, the following facts, much more important to me, are also true:

My dad never played in a rock and roll band, wrote songs, or recorded them. My dad never went to Europe. At 40, my dad had never lived in amazing places like Memphis, New Orleans, and New York. He had never been to Baltimore, Philadelphia, Washington DC, Mobile, St. Louis, Columbus, Natchez, Boston, Berkeley, San Antonio, Kansas City, Jacksonville, Nashville, Knoxville or Little Rock. He had never stayed out all night in the French Quarter or on the Left Bank. My dad had not read Chabon, Irving, Dickens, Proust, or Camus. He didn't have a college degree, nor did he and three of his idiot friends have a blog.

I am glad that he has always supported me in every decision I've made and I think he's been a little envious of my lifestyle from time to time, even if he didn't understand what in the hell I was doing sometimes.

Lurker, I think you've hit this particular milestone already? And Jay and Joe are close enough to kick it in the crotch. Today, I woke up the same as any other day, stretched, and felt glad to still be processing oxygen. Drink a 40 for your homie today y'all.

Just Minutes Ago ...

I almost got run off the fucking expressway. Getting cut off at 70 mph will definitely get your heart going in the morning.

Elvis Bound

I'll be leaving after school today to head up to Washington DC to see Costello and the Imposters. The set lists have been great- all rock and roll, mostly early stuff, but some choice deep cataloge cuts I've never heard live before. Full report upon return. BTW, I've also got tickets to see him with the North Carolina Symphony at an outdoor venue in September. This show: beer, fights, rock. That show: wine, cheese, symphonies.