We Must Be In That Self-Destructive / Acting Out Phase of the Crumbling Empire...

Seriously: provoking China?

I've Got Your Black Friday Right HERE!

Proud of myself for getting Dave's gift at Walgreens before someone at corporate put up the "item no longer available".

...And Happy Thanksgivukkah!

As the token Gentile* in this group, let me be the first to wish you all Happy Thankgivukkah! We may not be around for the next one (in 79,000 years), except for Joe - who is timeless. Or unless Jay re-formats the Hebrew lunisolar calendar.



*I know, I know. But a little research on ancestry.com and the Ellis Island immigration database helped turn up the following surnames:

Beckerstein
Rowlandberg
Eisencurtis
McGlück
Rosen-Rosenheinz

It was pretty compelling.

Drunky Happsgiving!

May yer beers be merry and yer drinks be numbing. Anyone traveling in the nightmare that is the east coast weather system?

Go Here Now

Waste your whole day with this thing. I dare you.

Friday Jay Reatard Fix*

*Memphis bastards may notice this is not, in fact, Jay Reatard.

Shorter Post For The Time-Conscious Bastard

Well, This Is Cool

From Dangerous Minds:

MAD magazine was at the absolute height of its circulation in the mid 1970s—north of two million of each issue hit the newsstands then—so it was no surprise that television executives wanted in on the action. ABC ordered a pilot for an animated MAD series, but shelved it due to the “adult” humor and apparently because they didn’t want to piss off their bread and butter. Dick DeBartolo (“MAD’s maddest writer!”) said of the ill-fated pilot (eventually aired as a one-off “special” apparently) “Nobody wanted to sponsor a show that made fun of products that were advertised on TV, like car manufacturers.”

The Greatest Television Asset Of All Time

In one of television’s biggest syndication deals, “The Simpsons,” the longest-running scripted show in TV history, will finally be moving to cable television... Fox sold the reruns to its FXX network... and ... has acquired both cable and streaming rights to the more than 550 episodes. Terms of the agreement were not disclosed, but a representative of one of the other companies that pursued the package said that the bidding was highly competitive and estimated that the per-episode figure reached $1.5 million to $1.6 million. That would put the value of the deal at close to $900 million.

World Toilet Day!

World Toilet Day

Definitely a bastard tradition.
You know what to do.

Photo Blog

I came across a pretty cool photo blog today.  It lacks some of the classier features of the pictorial sites I typically peruse (no naked female warriors wielding medieval weaponry, for example) and the photographer himself is probably a douchebag, but it beats a sharp stick in the eye. 

As someone who was making $400 million to make one movie once said, "I don't know if it's art, but I like it."  

Famous Paintings, But Funny

From The Elegant Gentleman's Guide to Knife Fighting, an Australian sketch comedy show.

Bastards Assemble! Or at least two of us!

The cool bastards assembled in Durham this weekend. Above you'll see, from left to right, me, Joe and Eric. It was a swell time except when Eric discussed his nipples and when the Saints lost. Also, I greeted Eric for the first time in maybe 30 years whilst dressed as a golfing zombie. Otherwise, business as usual. Below, our requisite Fuck Jay pic.

Raleigh Rally

Citizens of the blog: I invited myself to stay with founding Basterd Dave AND run a half-marathon in 35 degree weather this weekend!

Please tell me these are wise moves.

Brilliant!